Failure………. Maybe Mom and Dad should have changed my name to “Denis The Failure.” I’ve had my fair share of stumbles in life. Stupid Denis didn’t get many things right growing up, and I have failed many times in my career. But let me ask you, “When was the last time you failed at something?” Was it a minor setback, like spilling coffee on your shirt, or something bigger, like criminal issues, divorce, or not getting the desired job or even losing it? Failure is an inevitable part of life, but our culture often treats it like a taboo subject. From a young age, we’re taught that failure is wrong, something to be feared and avoided at all costs.

Think about it. When a role gets scrapped or a relationship ends, do you let frustration and disappointment take over? Do you beat yourself up over “wasted” time or feel like a total failure? But the key is not to let those reactions hold you back. Because the truth is that how we respond to failure ultimately determines our path forward. As John Maxwell said, “Failure is Not the Enemy, but How to Bounce Back and Grow Stronger.” It’s about resilience, bouncing back stronger than before, and not letting failure define us.  

I’ve seen this play out time and again – the people who can navigate failure with grace and resilience are the ones who ultimately achieve their goals and find true fulfillment. Their stories are not just inspiring, but they also serve as a reminder that success is often just a few failures away. It’s not about the number of times you fall but how you rise each time. It’s about resilience, it’s about growth, and it’s about the journey towards your goals. Remember, every failure is a stepping stone to success, and every setback is an opportunity for growth.

But what if we could change our mindset around failure? What if, instead of seeing it as the enemy, we could view failure as a teacher, a stepping stone to success, and a catalyst for growth? Imagine the possibilities if we could harness the power of failure to propel us forward. The potential for growth after failure is immense, and we should all be excited about it. It’s not the end, but a new beginning, a chance to learn and grow. There’s always a silver lining, an opportunity for growth, and a brighter future.

As I work with the John Maxwell Group and read leadership books, I am looking for information that will help me succeed, and I want to share it with you.

I have identified six strategies to consider in your life and career to learn how to effectively manage your frustration and what you need to understand to succeed. I came up with these by reading John Maxwell’s book Failing Forward: Turning Mistakes Into Stepping Stones for Success.” The keys are not from John’s book but rather from my experience and mental knowledge from reading his book. Let me encourage you all to read his book and understand why I came up with these six strategies.

So, how can you learn to deal with failure in a way that propels you forward?

Here are six strategies to get you started

Embracing Failure as a Stepping Stone

Thomas Edison, the inventor of the light bulb, is famously quoted as saying, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Edison didn’t see his failed attempts as failures; he saw them as steps on the path to success. Each “failure” brought him closer to his goal by teaching him what didn’t work.

We can adopt a similar mindset. Instead of beating ourselves up over mistakes, we can ask ourselves, “What can I learn from this?” “What would I do differently next time?” Failure is not the opposite of success; it’s a part of the journey to success.

The Power of Resilience

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from adversity, and it’s a key component of achieving long-term success. When we face setbacks and failures, we have two choices: let them defeat us or use them as opportunities to grow stronger.

People with grit don’t give up when they encounter obstacles. They keep going, even when things get tough.

We can build our resilience by practicing grit. When we fail, instead of giving up, we can choose to keep going. We can ask for help, learn from our mistakes, and try again. Over time, we’ll get better at bouncing back from setbacks, we’ll develop the strength and perseverance to achieve our goals.

Evaluate, Don’t Obsess

It’s natural to want to understand what happens when things go wrong. Take the time to reflect on the situation – what missteps were made, and what went right? Don’t be afraid to learn from your mistakes, but don’t get stuck in them. Use that insight to refine your approach next time around. Remember, every “failure” is a step closer to success.

It’s Not About You

It’s easy to take things personally and feel like failure reflects our worth. But most of the time, it’s just not true. Business setbacks and relationship endings often have far more to do with circumstances than with any failure on your part. Practice taking a step back, gaining some perspective, and reminding yourself that failure is a universal human experience. It’s how we grow.

Failing Forward

The concept of “failing forward” comes from the tech industry, where companies like Google and Amazon encourage experimentation and view failures as opportunities for growth. They know that the only way to innovate and stay ahead of the competition is to take risks, and sometimes those risks won’t pay off.

We can apply this same mindset to our own lives. Instead of playing it safe and sticking with what we know, we can take risks and try new things. We can embrace the idea that failures are inevitable and necessary for growth and progress.

When we fail, instead of getting discouraged, we can view it as a sign that we’re pushing ourselves outside our comfort zones and trying to grow. We can ask ourselves, “What can I learn from this experience?” and “How can I apply those lessons to move forward?”

You’re in Good Company

We tend to put successful people on a pedestal, forgetting that setbacks likely preceded every triumph. Henry Ford’s early car companies went bankrupt. Steve Jobs was once fired from Apple. J.K. Rowling was a single mom struggling to get by before Harry Potter took off. Martin Luther King Jr. got mediocre grades as a public speaking student. And Dr. Seuss faced rejection after rejection before his books became beloved classics.

So, when you hit a bump in the road, draw on the strength of those who have been there before you. Let their stories inspire you to keep going, to trust that this too shall pass. Because the only way to guarantee you won’t succeed is to give up. And I know that’s not you.

So What, Now What

Failure is not the enemy. It’s a teacher, a stepping stone, and a catalyst for growth. By changing our mindset around failure, we can turn setbacks into opportunities and use them to become stronger and more resilient. We can build the grit to achieve our goals and learn to “fail forward” with curiosity and openness.

So the next time you fail, don’t beat yourself up. Instead, ask yourself what you can learn, how to grow, and what to do to move forward. Remember, every successful person has experienced failure along the way. It’s not if you fail but how you respond that matters.

Will you let failure defeat you or use it as a stepping stone to success?

MY BIOGRAPHY